Barbecues and Bank Holidays

Do they always go together? With british weather we often aim for a barbecue and end up grilling everything in our woefully small domestic grills with the children moaning that it's raining and not getting that you don't want to stand outside on your own over a sputtering and smokey barbecue so their burgers can have a charcoal taste. Strange they moan if it's burnt under a grill, yet eat with gusto if it's off an open fire!
The Park have produced a leaflet on barbecues and picnics (although they have called it "picnicing", surely that's not English, is it?)so I thought I would add a few tips etc as people get this sort of thing so very wrong.
Firstly barbecues are meant to be fun. Try not to get stressed. They are never on time, and should not be rushed. Ensure everyone has drinks and put a few nibbly things out and don't panic.
Buy proper charcoal. Don't use those brickette things. They are too hot and don't last long if you are cooking for a lot of people. If you can, get some made charcoal- Pete and Tom, both Rangers, make it occasionally in the park, and have been known to sell it.
Buy meat from nice butchers- you know my views by now. Treat yourself to good sausages, better burgers, maybe some prawns, anything you like. Marinate things- this not only helps them to taste delicious, but it will tenderize meat, and it will cook faster. If you have steak put in a mixture of fresh herbs, black pepper and oil. Leave them as long as you want. If you have lamb chops, put them in oil, garlic and rosemary, add a little lemon juice if you like. Chicken you can add eveything to, but cut it small. The basic idea is cut everything the same size, and it will all cook at the same rate. Beware the cheap "barbecue packs" people sell. It's either cast offs or bad cuts that will toughen on a fierce heat.
Pre-cook some of the stuff. I know you'll say it's cheating. It isn't. You will be less stressed and things like sausages will be meaty and smokey and glorious, rather than charred, raw in the middle and dry. Cook sausages in the oven- cover them if you like until they are cooked, but with very little colour. Then cool them as quickly as possible, or throw them straight on the grill and colour them and let them take on the smokey taste. Steak and chops don't need precooking. Chicken, if you are doing thighs or larger solid pieces I would put through the oven first and then finish on the barbecue.
The other thing I have found when organizing these things is that people seem to think you need 10lb of meat per person. You really don't. Keep it simple. Dress it all with good fresh salads and you only need two types of meat. Do some roast vegetables- herbs and oil and garlic. They are so simple, but powerful flavours and you can serve them on skewers on the barbecue or in a dish from the oven.
If you would like onions- the type you get at fair grounds, start them early add oil and a little butter to a pan on a medium/low heat and add lots of onions. Leave them alone. Stir them occaisionally, when you are passing, but let them do their own thing. They will slowly release all their sugars and go a light brown colour, and smell heavenly. Leave the room every so often and when you return breathe in. You can smell them when they are done. They will have liquid in them, be a beige colour and people should walk past your house saying "I don't know why, I just really fancy a hotdog". You can let them go cold, and reheat them later. You can put them on full heat to reheat them- but stir them.
Don't skimp on salads- fresh leaves, tomatoes and red onions, coleslaw and some new poatoes, dressed gently in oil and fresh mint. Add some bread, and a bottle of robust red wine- if that's your thing, and away you go. Smile gracefully at any of your guests who tell you that you shouldn't light it like that, that they always do a whole leg of lamb on theirs or come and tell you that you'll burn everything and are you sure it's cooked? Just remember not to invite them next time!